Sometimes the Dyson vacuum cleaner of life sucks incredibly hard, rarely losing its suction. Luckily, there’s beer. Fresh, liquidy beer. Bubbly, delicious, colorful, aromatic and tasty beer. Some breweries have a dozen or so of these beer-type beverages on tap, some up to twenty at any given time. The Bruery in Placentia said, “fuck that sucky Dyson son of a bitch” and built a new tasting room with 40 taps next door to their exisiting brewhouse.

A few key features:

Air Conditioning. Over-ripe bearded dudes won’t fog up your nose-space in the hot summer months!
Flights! I’m having kittens over the flights!
Poofy ceiling. Dampens noise and will come in handy if Newton’s law gets revoked.
Two new flatscreen TV’s. Patrick Rue couldn’t confirm or deny People’s Court marathon Mondays. Maybe we can talk him into that Storage Wars show everyone is talking about.
40 taps plus one cask pump. Pumpers like to pump! All Bruery beers too.
Sealed off from brewhouse. No more fog bank of yeast mist. No gnats flying in your eyes like Sally Struthers in Africa. “For less than the cost of a tasting flight a day, you can make the difference in these children’s lives”.
No crazy artwork. Although a few Thomas Kinkaid and Wyland prints would really bring the space together. I kid, although I am strangely inspired to paint a Wyland style painting of a Whale getting eaten by yeast cells in a carboy of beer.
Reserve Society allocation pick up zone. Bigger cooler = more space for allocation. No more getting stuck driving around the Orange traffic circle for hours on end!
Open 7 days a week! More than double the open days? Beer Farfegnügen! Check their website for hours.
Drive through growler fill window off the side of the 57 freeway. I’m kidding about this one, as if anyone is still reading past #4.